Author: AaronEJ

To dam up a river only holds so long

Today is the day
That we play,
And do pray,
That the way,
Of the day,
Never goes away.
But I fear that this way,
May change too soon,
And if this does happen,
We will have to pay.

I will not let this happen,
I will try to turn,
The course time is headed,
And the way things do chance,
But I know this is hard,
And right now I’m alone,
It is easer to resist,
Than to move another way,
But in time,
I do know,
That to dam up a river,
Only holds so long,
But to change the direction,
To divert the flow,
Will last much longer,
Over time.
-Aaron E-J

Humidity is dampness,
So dreadful you can’t bear.
The mold that grows,
Like weeds or grass,
Cannot be cleaned in summers heat,
And if you even try,
The cleanest it will ever get,
Is hardly worth the stress.
For no motivation comes at all,
When you are drenched in sweat,
You’d rather go and drown in ice,
Or pack and move up north,
However now you’re headed home,
And what to wonders eyes?
An air condition has arrived,
Your daddy brought it home,
And as you step inside the room,
You cannot thank him more!
-Aaron E-J

Where, when, who, why,
And all the what ifs,
The questions keep poring,
And it’s getting kind of boring,
But the alternative scarier,
For if we stopped with the questions,
We wouldn’t progress,
There aren’t any answers,
When no questions are asked,
And our brains slowly decay
-Aaron E-J

Newspapers & Their Readers

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don’t really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn’t mind running the country — if they could find the time — and if they didn’t have to leave Southern California to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a far superior job of it, thank you very much.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s running the country and don’t really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who’s running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country but need the baseball scores.
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure there is a country … or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy provided, of course, that they are not Republicans.
11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.

BlamBamBing,
Went the sky on a Saturday night,
The rockets were zooming,
Through a cloudy spring sky,
To explode in bright flash of thousands of colors,
That illuminate nighttime with flashes of lightning,
And smoke which fills the air

As I sit down to watch the festivities begin,
I can not help but wonder when this all this began,
“Is it late?”
I do think,
“Will the fireworks get done?”
I do not need to worry, only check on my wrist,
The time is right there and its quarter past ten,
And that’s when the big bang went into the air,
To announce to the public that we were still there
-Aaron E-J

Listen to the MUSTN’TS, child,
Listen to the DON’TS
Listen to the SHOULDN’TS
The IMPOSSIBLES, the WON’TS
Listen to the NEVER HAVES
Then listen close to me –
Anything can happen, child,
ANYTHING can be.
-Shel Silverstein

“Who’s on First” – new version

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What’s happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the leader of China.

George: that’s what I want to know.

Condi: that’s what I’m telling you.

George: That’s what I’m asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow’s name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The man in China.

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now what are you asking me for?

Condi: I’m telling you, Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I’m asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That’s the man’s name.

George: That’s who’s name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you, or will you know tell me the name of new leader of China?

Condi: Yes sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he’s dead in the Middle east.

Condi: That’s correct.

George: Than who is?

Condi: Yes sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No sir.

George: Look Condi, I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General or the U.S. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No thanks.

Condi: You don’t want Kofi.

George: No, but now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the UN.

Condi: Yes sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the UN.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the UN?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?

Condi: Yes sir.

George: And stay out of the middle east! Just get me the guy at the UN.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right, with cream and two sugars.